Gratitude: Thanks for a moment in time

Katie and Equines       I owe my life to the compassion and kindness of the most amazing woman in the world. She believed in me when everyone else abandoned me. She reached out to me when I was in pain. She gave me a hug when I needed healing. She gave back my life after I had lost everything.

      It is hard to believe it has been only three years since I showed up on her doorstep, five hundred miles away from home, with nowhere to go and nothing to return home to. My marriage had gone sour. My relationship with my kids was terrible. Their relationships with each other were no better. We lived in constant crisis mode. The issues were rooted in dynamics of my marriage, but I was the one who got the blame for everything that was wrong with our family.

The Gulch       It is ironic, given that I worked every day of my life to make a positive difference in my family and in the world. Yet, all that blew up in my face. In the breakup of my family, I lost everything I ever worked for, cared about, or believed in. I was totally alienated and utterly alone with no one turn to, except for the kindness of this virtual stranger.

      Actually, Katie told me not to come. Twice. I just didn’t have anywhere else to go. I was drawn to her on raw instinct. We had met a couple times before and emailed back and forth a bit. She understood the depth of my problems at home. She was the only person who cared enough to really listen.

      Thirty miles away from her house in central Washington, I called and left a message. I didn’t know what I would do if she didn’t return my call, or if she told me to leave and go home. I considered driving back east to walk the Appalachian Trail. I wanted to run away and start my life anew. Returning home seemed like a death sentence.

      Fortunately, Katie returned my call and allowed me to come to her home, albeit, reluctantly. She understood that I needed help, and she responded with compassion. Besides, her hired help failed to show up, so she needed a dumb bloke to help build her corral.

Katie Corral       I stayed for a week. We built the corral. We talked. She listened to me when no one else would. She believed in me when no one else did. She gave me a hug when I was all alone. And there began a turning point for me to regain all that I had lost. In the ashes of my failed marriage and family, Katie was the angel who helped me carry onward. She gave me strength to deal with the issues at home. She helped me believe in myself again.

      Over time, I would prove that I am a good and competent father. My sons flourished at home and at school. My adult daughters gradually thawed towards me. I have grown to cherish my role as Dad, and I enjoy being a happy home-maker. I have kept my business alive and growing through the trials and turmoil of divorce from my ex. And I still try every day to make a positive difference in the world.

Tom and Katie       Katie and I progressed to become friends, partners, and lovers. We found great joy in our life together, and we proved ourselves to be an amazing team. I helped her achieve her dreams and goals, and she helped me achieve mine. More than anything, being with Katie filled me with gratitude. Life is short, and relationships are shorter, and one never knows what tomorrow will bring. But in the three years that we had together, I learned to love life again. As I often told her, “Thank you for this moment in time.” I am greatly sorry to lose her as my partner, yet eternally grateful for the time that we shared together. Katie gave my life back to me, and for that I can never thank her enough.


Thomas J. Elpel
June 29, 2013

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Filed under Autobiographical, Uncategorized

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